


lying upside down

by addove



Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Light Angst, Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 00:47:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28537572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/addove/pseuds/addove
Summary: "Is it breaking in if we unlock the door?" Xion asked. Sora spun on his heels, nodding with his usual toothy grin. At least someone got it.Ventus sighed. "Of course it is. The door was locked, wasn't it?""But we'reunlockingit."
Relationships: Naminé & Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Roxas & Sora & Vanitas & Ventus & Xion (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 60
Collections: Kingdom Heals





	lying upside down

The air was cold. It pushed against him, causing his breath to fog up the glass he leaned his forehead on. Even through the haze, Sora's reflection glared back at him. His eyebrows were furrowed, lips pulled into a deep frown. It looked closer to a pout than a glare, but he didn't _care_. The door was locked, sealed tightly shut, and no amount of pulling at the handle would change that. Not that Sora hadn't tried, of course. His hand was still gripped to the handle, in fact. He had only stopped shaking it moments before. No matter how hard he shook it, the door didn't budge.

Sora sighed, closing his eyes and letting his grip loosen. There was no point in being aggressive.

_However_...

"Ugh, open up!" Sora yelled, tugging at it once more with as much strength as he had. The door didn't budge, as he expected.

" _Sora_ ," Naminé hissed. "You're going to wake someone up."

Looking back at her through the reflection in the glass, Sora pouted. Naminé's expression softened, but the disdain for his outburst was still on her face. It was obvious she pitied him, and everyone else probably did, too, but he didn't care. Sora just wanted to go ice skating, really! There was nothing more disappointing than having to leave at two in the morning and then, upon showing up in San Fransokyo with as much discretion as possible, to have their destination be closed and locked tight. The sign on the door told them their office hours but all it felt like it did was mock him. The door stood firm in front of him, not budging after many, many, _many_ attempts by Sora to open it. It was definitely locked. And, well, he didn't _want_ to wait for the morning, but he couldn't exactly break into the building...

_Oh,_ Sora thought, holding out his hand. _Duh._

With a flash, his keyblade appeared in his hand, the cold metal a great relief to him. The ridges on the handle sunk into his skin, familiar and comforting, as it always was. Which, of course, didn't make much sense to him. After his battle with Riku in Hollow Bastion all those years ago, really, keyblades should be the exact _opposite_ of comforting, let alone relieving--

_Okay, shutting up now!_

"Sora, what are you doing?"

" _Oh,_ " Vanitas cooed, leaning forward enough to stare at Sora through the glass, "are we finally breaking into something?"

Even with the wind pressing against his ears, it was hard not to hear the snicker from behind him. Roxas moved next to Sora, ducking his head to hide the smile on his face. Sora couldn't help but bite down on his cheek to stop himself from smiling, too. They glanced at each other, then back at the group behind them, quickly looking away when they saw Naminé slap Vanitas on the head. From the glass’s reflection, they could see Xion roll her eyes with a hint of a smile. Beside her, Ventus only shook his head. He probably had the same thoughts as Naminé and Aqua on the matter.

Then again, there _was_ the time when Ventus had used his keyblade to unlock the pantry when Terra locked him out of it... not that Sora blames him, of course.

Never... not for the pastries.

"Is it breaking in if we unlock the door?" Xion asked. Sora spun on his heels, nodding with his usual toothy grin. At least _someone_ got it.

Ventus sighed. "Of course it is. The door was locked, wasn't it?"

"But we're _unlocking_ it."

"Not with a key!"

"It's still unlocked!"

"No, no, I agree with Ven," Vanitas said. He wrapped an arm around the person in question, a toothy grin spread across his face. His cheeks were slightly brighter due to the harsh wind, but even then he still managed to have a sickly hue to his skin. That, along with the mischievous glint in his eyes, could only mean he was either ready to wreak havoc in a way that Sora would totally disagree with... or totally agree with. Sometimes it was impossible to tell what Vanitas was thinking, but if it had to do with the ice rink...

Sora just _really_ wanted to get everything off his mind with a little bit of fun ice times and watching Roxas slip and fall.

Ventus shrugged Vanitas off of him, jabbing a finger to his chest. "You're _never_ on my side."

"Untrue! Remember when you tried to sneak out to see that movie with Lea-"

"Vani-"

"-and you almost got caught because you thought it was too rude to leave without a note?"

Ventus looked about ready to throttle Vanitas, and if given the chance he most likely would. _If_ , of course. They all needed to remember that it was so early in the morning that the sun hadn't risen yet, and if they _were_ going to break into an ice rink (Sora was confident that he would, in fact, do so), they had to be quiet about it. _"Don't let anyone catch you"_ and all of that.

Not that Sora planned to be caught.

Not that Sora had even planned to be here to _begin_ with. There wasn't a single moment beforehand where he had gathered his friends and said _"We should all go skating together!"_ No, he had simply bolted upright out of bed three hours earlier with an ache in his chest and decided he wasn't going to let it keep him down.

It spiked a weird sort of adrenaline in him. Sora wasn't exactly excited, nor was he anxious, he just... felt strong. Like nothing could touch him. It was the sort of feeling that came after a decision that he wouldn't have made normally and that _somehow_ that night was different, even if it really wasn't. He didn't want anything to take that feeling away from him-- if anything, he wanted to keep feeling like he was walking on air, high above the clouds with the world underneath him, ready for him to take.

That terrible, no good, very bad feeling in his gut is what led him, Roxas, Xion, Naminé, Ventus, and Vanitas to be standing out in front of an ice rink in San Fransyokyo at 2 in the morning. Whatever anxiety held him in chains would disappear soon, he hoped. He knew, really. It had disappeared whenever he did something rash enough to let him forget his woes, really.

Of course, that did depend on whether or not they actually broke into the ice rink. While Sora had done a lot of reckless things in his lifetime (re: a _lot_ ), he doesn't think he's ever actually broken into anything. Even that time in the Toy Box, the door was open, wasn't it? Besides... toys couldn't commit crimes. Right?

The door made Sora feel like he was being stared at with the most mocking of looks.

He was tempted to give the handle another shake.

"I think we should go in," Xion said. "If Isa finds out we snuck out again at 2 in the morning and we get nothing out of it, I'm going to be _very_ disappointed in you all."

Roxas jumped. "Shit, I hadn't even thought about that!"

"Forget about them! Aqua would _kill_ me!" Ventus cried, running both hands over his face. The look in his eyes was one of pure horror. Even so, Vanitas (who, apparently, was the only one not afraid of Aqua) snickered, hiding his smile behind his hand.

"I... do not think Aerith would be mad," Namine paused. She put a hand against her cheek, closing her eyes as she thought. "Leon, though..."

Sora nearly forgot she lived with them. Even with how much they loved him... if Naminé showed up with nothing to show for it, they would kill him for _nothing_.

_Oh_.

"Riku!" Sora yelled, his keyblade falling from his hands. It disappeared before it could hit the concrete, making no noise as the light took it back to... wherever it came from in the first place. "Gods, and _Kairi_ ! They'll kill me. Oh, they're _so_ going to kill me. I'm dead!"

That _really_ made Vanitas laugh. Even if he wasn't outwardly happy too often, he still let himself bend over, clutching his stomach as he laughed. Namine slapped the back of his head when he got too loud, shushing him to silence. Sora crossed his arms, watching Vanitas straighten himself up with a glare. When he finally decided to speak, his face had a look of pure satisfaction.

"Oh, you're _so_ dead."

_Asshole._

"Man... are we really gonna go home without having any fun?" With a pout, Xion let her shoulders sag.

"This is what happens when we go to an ice rink at 2 in the morning, Xion," Ventus said.

"What, like it's _my_ fault?"

"I didn't say that-"

Vanitas crossed his arms. "You might as well have."

"But I didn't!"

Sora listened to them bicker with a small smile on his face. It didn't reach his eyes, but he couldn't help but feel... light, watching them. Being there with them.

Even in the cold at 2 in the morning with little to look forward to, with a distant pain nagging at his gut, he couldn't help but feel like nothing could touch him.

He wondered when it was when he had gotten something... something so blessed. The people around him, the love he felt every time he so much as looked in their direction. He could hear their voices, a laugh, a sob, anything at all, and his heart would swell. There were people here that loved him. There were people around him that Sora couldn't help but look at with the most sincere looks of love, of appreciation, of gratitude so great that everything else seemed to disappear.

In his time of greatest need, he wouldn't be alone. There would be those next to him that would help him pick himself up, who would tell him that he isn't alone. In a time where he would fall into darkness, Sora could dust himself off and keep going, a hand reaching out to steady him before he fell again, and another in front of him to keep him protected when he couldn't protect himself.

Maybe it was like this for his whole life. Maybe he always had someone to keep him grounded, to give him a shoulder to lean on. But Sora... Sora never took the time to appreciate it.

For years he spouted the same nonsense about his friends, believed in the same words he was telling others, but he never once stopped to think if he was really, truly leaning on them like he said he was. Never once did he ask himself if he was putting everything on his own shoulders, if he could ask for help. He never let himself open up, guarding his heart with more locks than any keyblade could possibly open up. Everything was locked up so tight, shoved so far deep, no light could ever hope to reach it. Everything he had known was cradled in darkness, the type of which felt more comforting and reassuring than angry and full of hatred.

Vanitas had once told him that that was what the darkness did. It wrapped you in a blanket that felt so safe, so warm, so guarded, that nobody could ever dare hurt you. Sora couldn't help but agree. If not anyone else, he would understand.

It was calming, Sora thought. It was safe. It was reassuring and comforting when the outside world was not. It was the place where he could look at everything that had hurt him, everything that had cost him dearly, and shove it away. The place where he could forget about it all and move on, where he could _pretend_ to move on.

But he didn't want to pretend. Sora wanted to be okay again.

There had been a night, once, when Xion had caught him sitting atop the clocktower in the early hours of the morning. _Nightmares_ , he had said. They always came to him on the days he managed to sleep, if he had gotten those at all. Sora still wasn't sure if he could have fooled her into walking away, if it would've been better for them if he had.

Even so, she had sat down next to him, took out her phone, and texted the group chat.

Not even half an hour later, the two of them, Ventus, Roxas, Namine, and Vanitas were holed up at the top of the clocktower covered in heavy blankets with more snacks than they could eat themselves, watching the sunrise over the horizon together. Sora had fallen asleep before anyone else, he was told, too tired to even sit upright anymore. The picture of them all together was still on his phone-- with him asleep on Vanitas' shoulder (with him looking uncharacteristically soft, even _if_ he swore he'd kill Sora if anyone else ever saw that picture), and the other four crowded around them.

They had been patient then. And they were patient now.

He would open up. Little by little, he would open up. And they would be there for him, like they always were.

Sora moved to lightly touch the bracelet on his wrist, feeling the chords against his skin.

"You really want to break into an ice rink and then leave on our magic space ship, never to be seen again?" Naminé asked, placing both hands on her hips.

"Uh... yeah?" Xion shrugged.

_That's not fair,_ Sora thought. _I visit here all the time._

Vanitas snickered, linking his arms with Namine and Ventus. "Come on, it'll be fun. Just this once."

"You say _'just this once'_ and then we're gonna end up doing it again next week!" Ventus said. He let out an exasperated sigh, pulling his arm away from Vanitas. All he got in return was a sly smile.

" _Oh_ , 'we,' huh? So you're in?"

Before Ventus could reply, Roxas groaned.

"Are we breaking in or not?" Roxas asked, laying an arm onto Sora's shoulder and leaning into his side.

Sora wondered when he had gotten this. When he had gotten them.

Xion jumped onto her tiptoes. With a hand raised into the air, she smiled brightly. "I vote yes!"

Before anyone could say anything, she moved to stand next to Vanitas and linked her arm with his. He rolled his eyes, sneering as he turned his head away. Even then, it was impossible to miss the hint of a smile that tugged at his lips, as well as how he didn't shove her away. To anyone else, it might have looked like Vanitas was seething with disdain, but to the five of them, they could see the hints of fondness, even if they weren't stark white. That _and_ the fact that he hadn't cursed her out.

Oh, Vanitas. Never change.

"I _do_ want to go ice skating..." Ventus mumbled, wincing as he spoke.

"And I want to see you fall on your face," Roxas said, grinning.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah."

They kept bickering, and his heart swelled.

What _had_ he done to have such people in his life? Nothing he could have done could ever be enough to deserve such a family. People who were there for him when he fell, who he could trust when he needed something. Really, were there any other people in the world that would help him break into an ice rink when he needed company?

Sora wasn't alone, that he knew. Riku and Kairi vowed to be there for him whenever he needed, whenever they could. But they weren't the ones there for him when Sora couldn't look at his keyblade without getting sick. Roxas was. They weren't the ones there for him when his hands wouldn't stop shaking, when not a single breath of air could enter his lungs. Naminé and Ventus were. Nobody else had been there when he hadn't slept in a week, too scared of the shadows in his room moving to get him, too terrified of looking into the mirror and seeing yellow eyes stare back at him. Vanitas had been there, then, making sure he could go to sleep knowing he wouldn't let anything hurt Sora.

And nobody else was there that night, upon the clock tower, when Sora was gripping the concrete so hard his knuckles paled, when he was shivering so much that his skin was losing its color. Xion was, and it had been her who kept him warm and kept him company. It was her who told everyone else to come over with a dumb movie they could watch on Sora's gummiphone, and they who kept him company when he felt like his whole world was breaking into pieces.

The universe knew how much Riku and Kairi meant to him. They were literal parts of his heart, and he wouldn't let them go for the world. He loved them so, so much, truly. But he loved his little puzzle of a family, too. The ones who shared his heart, and him theirs.

"So?" Roxas nudged Sora's side.

Looking up, Sora took a deep breath. The air was cold against his face, stinging his cheeks but leaving him with a smile on his lips. The moon stared back down at him, and the stars with her.

"Sora?" Namine called.

It felt nice, just standing there. Simply listening to the world around him, surrounded by the people he loved, looking up at the wide, open sky.

Xion frowned. "You okay? You've been quiet."

"Yeah, God _forbid_ him be silent for once."

" _Vani_." Ventus hissed. Vanitas shrugged, smiling all the same.

Sora laughed, shaking his head. He would get Vanitas back for that.

"Never better, Xion." He said, turning to face the doors in front of him.

He was being honest, that time.

"Then let's get this show on the road!" Roxas said. "You know, before we get caught."

With a flick of his wrist, his keyblade materialized back into his hand. Holding it out in front of him, the end began to glow. Sora had to bite his cheek to stop himself from smiling.

Really, how _hadn't_ they gotten caught?

**Author's Note:**

> My finished [ Kingdom Heals Zine Fic! ](https://twitter.com/khealszine)


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